The Billionaire Bum

By: Samantha Blair

“And then, when I call him on it, he tells me that I wouldn’t survive one week in the wilderness on my own, unless I bought a ton of his camping gear.” I paused while the waitress set our burgers in front of us. “This looks so good. I was freaking starving.”

Jason was still shaking his head and laughing across the table. “He’s right though,” he said.

“Who’s right?” I asked.

“Matt Ozwell. Wilderness survival sucks. I sure as hell wouldn’t want to try it.”

“What?” I paused with my burger halfway to my mouth. “You don’t think I could do it?” I looked at David, who just shrugged and returned his attention to his fries.

Jason smiled his typical huge goofy smile at me, and I knew I was in trouble. “No, I don’t,” he said. “I’ve got $50,000 that says you can’t last one week in the wild.” He was cracking up laughing.

“What?” Not this again. David was laughing and shaking his head, clearly trying to stay out of this bit of brother bonding time.

“You heard me,” Jason said. “I’ll bet you fifty grand that you don’t make it one week in the woods. Hell, I’ll even let you have a tent!”

“You can’t be fucking serious,” I said. “I’m a newlywed. ‘Lissa will kick my ass!”

“Take Alissa with you,” he said. “When was the last time you two had an adventure together? It’ll be a marriage builder. If I remember correctly, it worked out okay for you two the last time we tried this kinda’ thing.”

I looked back to David. “What do you think, Dave?”

“I think I’m staying as far away from this as I can. Lexy will kill me if she finds out that I had a hand in making Alissa spend a week in the woods.” I laughed at that. Lexy could be quite a handful. David was a smart man to stay on her good side, but Jason was right. Alissa and I both worked a lot, and we didn’t get to spend as much time together as I would like. We hadn’t even taken a honeymoon yet – preferring to wait until the ongoing legal matters were all solved.

Nick’s trial had just wrapped up last week. He got thirty years for kidnapping, assault with a deadly weapon, embezzlement, and a whole list of other charges. I was so relieved to have the whole mess behind us, and I knew Alissa was, too.

My businesses had settled down again with a new board member to replace Kayla. She was doing fabulously in her new role. The investigation into Robert had determined that he made a bad judgment call, but was not maliciously involved in anyway. He was doing his job a little more cautiously now, but was actually performing better than ever. The press had lost interest, as they always do, and we were back to business as usual.

Maybe it was time to move on to the next great adventure. Alissa was an incredible woman; she would understand.

“Deal,” I said. “Fifty thousand dollars says Alissa and I are perfectly fine after living one week in the wild.”

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